We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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