please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
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The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
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I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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