I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
