this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
