do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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