All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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