Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
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Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
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My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.