please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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