So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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