awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
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Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
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The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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