She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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