After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
