So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
