Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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