Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I wear drunk well.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
