Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
