also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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