She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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