17 year olds will be the death of me.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
