Cold hands, warm shart.
i think i have herpe
just one?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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