Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
