dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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