You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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