Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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