This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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