Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
