I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
