I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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