Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
