I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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