There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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