They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
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Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
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Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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