I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
