My balls are so social today.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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