we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
