I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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