i will never coherently bang her
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
We need to get me chipped asap
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
