Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
