we're blogging at a bar
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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