i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
