i jhust puked up my retainher.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
