I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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