I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's great music for shaving your balls
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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