Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
My life is pants optional.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
