Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Randomize