I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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