What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
