Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize