don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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