You really coming over, don't trick.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
