He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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