i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Sorry my hands just texted you
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
