We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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